Dear Mookychick,

I've been going out with my boyfriend for about 2 and a half years, and although I love him very much, there are aspects of our relationship that are making me feel like I no longer want to be with him, most notably his agoraphobia.

He has had agoraphobia since a teenager (he is now 32, I am 26) and he has managed to control most aspects of it up to a point - he is not housebound and has a good job and his own flat. However, his agoraphobic tendencies haven't gone away completely and he still hates going on a plane and on holiday. This means that I miss out on some things that I would like to have in a normal relationship, such as going out more and socialising (he prefers to stay at home and doesn't like clubbing) and going on holiday. I have been patient up until now, but I now feel that I need to be a bit more selfish and feel I am stopping him meeting the 'one', which I consider to be unfair on both of us. I feel terribly harsh saying all this, but at the end of the day, life is too short and I feel like I need to go out and meet someone who is better suited and more outgoing. The thing is, I can't seem to break up with him that easily as I have a lot of happy memories and find him a very caring, supportive and kind person who I would miss a great deal. I also know, however that you shouldn't stay with someone for the sake of it, and that you have to be cruel to be kind in this life.

I think I know what I should do, as I have been unhappy with these aspects of our relationship for a while, but it's finding the courage to do it. Is it the right move? Will I regret it? And, although he has made some effort to understand what I feel, he hasn't taken enough action (in my opinion) to change enough. I know you shouldn't try and change anyone, but I don't know whether making a break for it now will be a cop-out and if I should stay with him and try to strengthen what we do have in our relationship...

Please help!

Love, Anonymous Me xxx