"Dear Mookychick,

I need advice, based on the last 6 years of my life, so let me tell you the story. I'm a 24 year old female. The past 3 years of my life I have been in the working world and the 3 before that I was at Uni. The story begins in my first year of Uni.

I was 18, young, free and single and pretty inexperienced in life in general. I met this guy at the end of the first term, just before the Christmas break, we clicked straight away. Over Christmas he said he was going away with one of his mates for a few days to France, thought nothing if it at the time as we had just met. Anyway, back at Uni after Christmas we proceeded to "see each other" – we were never boyfriend and girlfriend (he never wanted to get that serious and kept it pretty low-key). However we got on really well and I fell for him. This takes us up to the end of the Summer Holidays (going into second year of Uni). He suddenly ends it, no good reason either, still wants to be friends. I was upset, but stayed friends. Was out in town one night and thought I'd give him a call and see what he was up to. Rang his house phone and a girl answered. Thought it was his flat mate's girlfriend, so asked her who it was and she said her name. Immediately I knew it was my guy's supposed "ex"! So I called him all the names under the sun, she asked why and I told her that we'd been seeing each other

since Christmas. Got off the phone and stormed over to his, he refused to see me and first but I refused to leave – I wanted an explanation. He eventually came out, head down, couldn't look me in the eye – no good excuse, just didn't know who to choose. Turned out he had been seeing her back home on and off whilst seeing me at Uni. In fact, the holiday to France was with her!

Weeks passed and he still wanted to be friends, she had left him too. However he insisted that our friendship had to be a secret and I knew I deserved better than that. So I cut ties with him. New term at Uni I saw they had got back together. I was heartbroken.

Last 2 years of Uni passed, I had a string of one-night stands and one couple of month relationship but still got the pang when I saw him.

Right towards the end of my last year he suddenly added me back on to MSN. I was so shocked but my heart secretly skipped a beat. We had a conversation online – how are you? How's life been treating you? And eventually agreed to meet up. Within weeks we were getting close again and on the day of my graduation we made it official. I knew it would take a while to forgive him, but he said he was a idiot that didn't really know how he got himself into that situation and couldn't get himself out of it at the time.

Over the next 2 and half years we built up the trust again, I was no longer a secret and we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We were so in love with each other, I was so happy, I would have married him and had his babies. We moved in together pretty much straight away, first of all I was a lodger at a place with him and his mate, then the following year we moved into our own flat. 99% of that was wonderful. But he wasn' t happy living so far away from his hometown and friends. So we moved about 20 miles closer, but he still wasn't entirely happy with that and neither of us saw our friends as much as we should have. He started to come up with ideas about moving back home for a while to save up money for a mortgage which I never liked the idea of as I just couldn't face living back home – I had made my own life now. So he suggested that he do it and I find a flat mate. I hated the idea, but eventually said I'd happily do it for a year. But he refused and said a year was not enough and that it had to be indefinitely until he had paid off his student loan. I wasn't happy, saying how can we go from living together to just seeing each other at weekends and said I didn't think that the long distance thing would work. So he ended it, if I didn't think it would work – what was the point apparently. I was heart broken once again, and before he left that night I told him that we could never go back now. Once my family knows about this, they would never forgive him again apart form anything else. But he still walked out.

8 months down the line from that point now. Once again we have remained friends, we were so close during our relationship that it was too hard to completely cut off again and we had always said we would remain friends. Its been good being friends and seeing each other now and again for a DVD and pizza night. But now he's started saying that he's missing me, he still loves me, and that if we are meant to be together we will, he's basically saying he made a mistake again!

Now as you can imagine I'm pretty confused now. I have spent the last 8 months since our break up telling myself that is over for ever, my family hate him and although they're too nice to say I'm sure my close friends probably wouldn't advise it. But I still love him, and I was so wrapped up in our relationship before, I would have given my life for his if I had to. I still dream about him on a weekly basis, if not more and I still picture the future that we had talked about.

What the hell do I do?

Love, Anonymous Me xxx