Alternative Teen Pregnancy
Alternative model Miss Evil is about to become a Mooky Momma. Society needs to acknowledge and support teen pregrancy and not file it as taboo.
Alternative teenage mum – twice the taboo, half the support.
Teenage pregnancy. Not always an easy topic to approach. In my household teenage pregnancy has always been frowned upon and treated as the highest, shall we say, “discrepancy” anyone could ever achieve. In fact, because I was the youngest child of two and especially because I was a girl, sex was a taboo. As unspoken of and as shunned as piercings and tattoos! That may seem strange to some – why would piercings and tattoos ever be shunned? But I’m sure a few of you know what I’m talking about.
If only society would acknowledge that it’s okay to have more than one life-plan. More than one dream.
Coming from a middle class background with a pressure to well at school, I was raised to expect myself to continue on to university and after that get a well-paying job, and these expectations were the height of my life until a few months ago. Coping with a strict environment is hard enough for an alternative girl with a love of dyed hair and snakebites; it became even harder when I found out I was pregnant at 18. Just at the end of sixth-form, and right before my final exams. I couldn’t be more worried and shaken up. I was terrified. The worst part was, how could I tell mum and dad? Remember, in my family these things are never talked about. Hey, I’m convinced they thought I was a virgin until only last year!
Hey, parents. Us teen mums do actually want to talk to you, you know. We want your trust and support.
I suppose that’s what really bugs me about this whole thing; the talking. Why don’t girls feel they can talk to their parents about any of this stuff? Why did I feel the need to wait 12 weeks into my pregnancy before I could even utter a word about it to them? At a time in my life where I needed the most support, it just wasn’t all there. Maybe if I’d talked to them sooner, it would have been better and I wouldn’t have had to deal with the news of my pregnancy and studying for A-levels on my own. Of course I got support from friends, and luckily for me my boyfriend has been there every step of the way. But it’s not like that for everyone.
I’m a prime example that making things into taboos and never speaking of them doesn’t prevent them. Here I sit with a 22 week baby bump, three facial piercings, stretched ears and dyed hair. I never did any of these things for “rebellion” and the baby definitely wasn’t planned! Attaching stigmas to these things doesn’t help in the slightest. They should be talked about, discussed and supported. Not shunned. Not disrespected.
University can and will still happen for me.
I’m an alternative soon-to-be teen mum; I’m still hoping to go to university once my baby is 9 months old. I know I’m going to get looks and stares. I know my family aren’t too pleased with me. But I’m doing it and I’m coping. My aspirations haven’t gone out of the window like most people would think, and I’m looking forward to meeting my baby girl. It’s been difficult and I wish there was more support in place for teen mums, and also for girls who find themselves pregnant and don’t know what to do. It’s not easy, and I wish that instead of feeling frightened and unable to tell anyone they are pregnant, girls should be able to openly speak to their mums, teachers, relatives and guardians about what’s going on and how they are feeling. There’s no need for teen pregnancy to be such an outlawed concept. It does happen, and it needs to be recognized and helped.
Tagged in: alternative maternity