How to deal with a stalker
Dear Mookychick,
A few weeks ago, I reunited with an old friend of mine (let's call him Fenwick), who moved away to Germany years ago. Before that, we used to tell each other everything; our secrets, experiences, and everything two best friends would tell each other. He was my only friend, and I was a bit dependent on him, since I was younger. When he visited me, he looked through my facebook account while I was gone, and interrogated me about another friend of mine -let's call him Zachariah - demanding information about him. He attempted to emotionally hurt me by recalling my feelings in the past, reminding me of how much I depended on him. When that failed, and I told him that I am not as dependent and relied on Zachariah a bit more, he tried to pin me down and attack me. However, I managed to grab a perfume bottle and bash him on his head. Since then, he has made several attempts to attack me, and left a physical wound on my left cheek. It became serious to the point of Zachariah having to walk me home!
Soon, I believed he had finally left my hometown to head back to Germany, until I learned recently that he has not yet returned to Germany, and no one is aware of his current location. However, nothing occurred and I no longer needed Zachariah to protect me after school. However, I received a small gift in my mailbox with no address or label of any sort, with only a note saying "it has been several weeks since we met. Here is something I know you'll like." I opened the package to reveal locks of brown-black hair, which I know belongs to him. I was frightened and paranoid, and I couldn't help but cry in frustration. I know he is still out there, and I'm terrified! What should I do, if I am unaware of his whereabouts?
Help!
Love, Anonymous Me xxx
The Mookychick answer to your problem
Lottie says...
Hey, there...
If you are scared for your own safety and others then it is wise to tell someone who can deal with it appropriately. Tell your mum, dad, anyone who takes care of you and if it gets any worse then other authorities need to be taken into consideration. If you are certain the package was from Fenwick and do not necessarily want to go to anyone else beforehand then it is possible to talk to Fenwick himself, either in person (make sure people know where you are and when they can expect a phone call from you) or via various other ways (facebook, email, text, letter etc) then let him know that what he is doing is unacceptable, and that people change, grow up and things cannot be exactly how they where before he moved to Germany. For legal reasons, it may be worth contacting him in writing to leave a paper trail for legal reasons.
If he does not take this well (and considering events so far he may be likely to) then I am afraid it is best to get other people involved. You have to be firm with Fenwick in telling him how his behaviour has made you feel and make sure you stand your ground if he apologises for his actions. Hope this helps.
More Health, Hairstyles, Makeup Tips & How-Tos on Mookychick
Meet the girls...
We are experienced girls of the world who'll give you down-to-earth advice on any problem. Many of us have no professional advice experience whatsoever but when did that ever stop anyone? We've lived life to the full and are totally on your side!
Lottie is a recently graduated psychology student, looking to help individuals in any way that she can. She'll combing her great listening skills and unbiased advice with a willingness to share her life experiences so far with you.
Have an advice question?
Career advice? Feminist advice? Love advice? Soul advice? Evil-life advice? We will do our best, dear Mooks.
First check our ADVICE COLUMN.
If you have a question about a first kiss / first sexual encounter / boyfriend moving far away, there is a good chance your question - or one much like it - has already been answered.
Next, visit our Mookychick Community Boards. We're helpful and aim to be amazing on a daily basis. You may way find the answer to your question in HEADSPACE, LOVE & SEX or HEALTH.
If not, email editor at mookychick.co.uk with your question. Make 'Dear mookychick - [the title of your question]' the subject title of your email. Then at least one mooky Agony Sister will give you their advice. We can't guarantee to answer every question that has not yet been covered, but we do try.
Once your anonymous question receives an answer, we will email you the link.
Again, we're really sorry but we can't answer all questions. They weren't bad questions - we just get too many to be able to answer them all. But if something's really burning you, please do let us know - not only you but everyone else who didn't dare to ask will benefit from you taking action.
With love from Mooky Central xxx





