How to be a band groupie

Oh, come on. We’ve all done it: One minute you’re interested in the music, the next you’re within flirting distance to your favourite band member, and whatever you’ve done/said has made you a member of the ‘I will never be able to look that guy in the eye again’ brigade. Want that to change? As a girl that has been there and made all the mistakes (and some extra ones for good measure) I have learned enough to bag the front man of a hot band more than once. Here’s how.

1. Comment on the show… but not too much.

Yes, everyone wants to know that the show was good, but they are likely to have enough sycophants to gush over them and enough technical guys to tell them the mic was off for the first song. Mention it – then move on.

2. Drop hints about mutual interests appropriately.

It will look too obvious if you try too hard to point out how much you have in common. Pick one thing to drop into conversation and it will seem more natural.

3. Chill.

I know it can be hard: He’s gorgeous, he’s talented, he’s the man of your current dreams. But take a step back so you’re not crowding him overzealously (if he’s talking to you he’s noticed you already), take a deep breath and just let conversation roll. Remember he’s just a guy and you’re a cool, independent girl he should be pleased wants to talk to him.

4. Let eye contact drift then return.

This may sound simple, but trust – I once took ‘maintain eye contact’ to mean ‘stare into his eyes forever’. This, girls, is BAD. Keep contact for a few seconds, then let your eyes drift elsewhere and come back. It will make you look like he’s not your sole focus in the room. Always cool and intriguing.

5. NO merchandise wearing.

I don’t care if a band t-shirt is the last piece of clothing you have, nothing singles you out as being a ‘completely obvious fan’ more than wearing brand merchandise if you’re aiming to get the attention of a band member. Seriously, go naked if you must but ignore this rule at your peril!

6. ‘Admit’ embarrassing things in a cool way.

Yes, we are strong girls, but a bit of vulnerability can sometimes be cute.

Good = “Well it’s kind of embarrassing, but I’m still crap at tuning a guitar after a year of playing”.

Bad = “Well it’s kind of embarrassing, but I have your last single as my ringtone”.

Get the picture?

7. Walk away first – This is the golden rule.

Even if you haven’t done all of the above, ending it politely before he does is crucial, and shows you aren’t obsessed, insane or becoming boring.

Journalist Carrie Borzillo-Vrenna is known for her popularity with band members

Pamela des Barres was the ultimate smart supergroupy