I think I’m pregnant
Please help me with some teenage pregnancy advice. I think I might be pregnant… and I’m only 15! I’m turning 16 in a couple days but still, I’m too young. My parents are major-christian and hate me dating, so I don’t know what I’m gonna tell them if it turns out I really am. I’ve only slept with one guy and he’s my boyfriend. I’ve already talked with him about it and he promises me that he’ll be there through everything and help me out… but what if my parents find out and won’t let me see him anymore? Or what if they try and take my baby away? I don’t even know if I am yet so I probably shouldn’t be worrying about all this but I hate not knowing. I can’t stop worrying and I don’t know what I’ll do if it turns out I really am pregnant. Please help
Love, Anonymous Me xxx
The Mookychick answer to your problem
Oh my poor girl! I hope by now you’ve taken a pregnancy test, found it’s negative and this has all been a nasty scare that has taught you a very harsh lesson. Please, please make sure you always use contraception, not just to avoid unwanted pregnancies but also to avoid catching any sexually transmitted diseases.
If you’ve tested positive you really have to tell your parents. You cannot even think of going through this alone. Is there a cool aunt or sympathetic teacher you could talk to first? Someone who could help you break the news to your parents? If you’re adamant you want to have your baby, telling an adult you trust might prove to be a useful ally if your parents try to get you to give the child up for adoption.
Your folks will undoubtedly be angry and confrontational at first but they’ll come round pretty quickly – they have to in a crisis like this. Be sure you know what you want to do with the situation. At the end of the day, it’s your body and a baby will be your responsibility. Look at all the options and really think things through.
In my quest to find some useful pregnancy helplines and websites based in America, I have to say that most I found were christian sites which were rather biased against pregnancy termination.
Weigh up the options between motherhood, abortion and termination at http://thehelpline.org/unplanned-pregnancy/general-information/my-three-choices/ and www.optionline.org. Should you decide on a termination, www.abortionclinicpages.com will give you some guidance.
However, it sounds like you’ve made up your mind and will find a lot of support and useful stuff at www.standupgirl.com which is aimed at pregnant teens and offers all sorts of help and advice for young mums, their boyfriends, and families with lots of interaction on the girls forum. In the meantime, I wish you all the luck in the world with telling your parents and making the right decision.
First of all, the worst thing about abortion is that if contraceptives were as easy to come by as 99-cent greaseburgers, instead of being locked behind the pharmacists’ counter at the drugstore and not passed out for free to anyone who wanted them (as they are online via condoms4free.com which has been around forever) the abortion problem would be limited to cases where the condom broke, the pill fizzled, or you were f*cking Superman, whose sperm are so virile they laugh in the face of latex. Unfortunately, sex education in America means teaching children what an erection is, what menstruation is, and giving a firm warning to ABSTAIN.
Surgical abortion costs about $400 and many are done at low-cost clinics. About three out of four women pay for the procedure straight up, though some of them are compensated later by insurance. Just one out of ten are covered by Medicaid (free insurance for the very, very poor, usually only provided by the state since George W. Bush said no federal funds for abortions) and about the same amount are billed to private insurance. Before about two months, you can get medication abortion, which works via pill, and after you get dilation and evacuation, which is a procedure that has to be performed on you by a medical professional.
If you are younger than 18, the plot thickens. In some states you have to have your parents agree to your abortion, and if someone drives the minor across state lines to get it done somewhere where that’s not required, it’s a crime (though the child can appear before a judge, apparently, to explain why she should be allowed to have an abortion).
For more information in America, the National Abortion Federation hotline is 1-800-772-9100 and Planned Parenthood’s hotline is 1-800-230-PLAN.